Look at me,
My depth perception must be off again-
`Cause this hurts deeper than I thought it did.
It has not healed with time.
Sometimes, I feel like I've lost all faith in humanity.
Today, I went to Unique, which is a thrift store in the shopping center with Great Wall and Five Guys and such, next to Luther Jackson?
And I bought a ton of nice clothes! :D
But! The point is, I saw a few nice navy blue and white striped shirts, so I reached my hand out and started to look through them, when this lady turned around and like pulled them away and very sternly and stiffly said, "I'm trying these on."
This freaked me out, but I tried to be courteous and kind of have a laugh about it, I suppose? I said "Oh, I'm sorry!" and smiled, looking up to find her glaring at me with these eyes of steel. She had an ice cold expression and didn't say a word and seemed just pissed off and annoyed with what I'm guessing she just saw as some stupid teenage girl...
We had a few seconds of awkward eye contact, and I don't see why she didn't smile or say something, or at least stop staring, if anything! -_-
I try so hard to convince myself that it's hard to find evil and cruelty in human kind, but they just keep turning back around and proving me wrong. Whether it be something as small and trivial as this incident, or it be something like wasting energy and resources, murdering, stealing (on a high scale, I can't say I haven't stolen, haha), cheating, lying, betraying. These are actions that occur on a daily basis. I want so much to believe that evil doesn't exist; that there are causes for the way people are, and a cure.
Can't you change a person for the better?
Or am I just too hopeful for reality?
CLT: Lately my chest hurts more than ever when I breathe in deeply. Ugh. One of my biggest fears is that I'm developing some sort of cancer or deadly disease that I don't know about yet, because I rarely go to the doctors and get check ups or whatever. At least, I don't remember having done so for a few years xD Then again, it's not really a fear...more of something that I suspect sometimes. This hurts so much, you don't even know.
I also haven't gotten my period for months.
-_____-
life reminders for the memory-impaired.
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
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favorite books.
- running with scissors - augusten burroughs
- slaughterhouse five - kurt vonnegut
- the curious incident of the dog in the night time - mark haddon
- the perks of being a wallflower - stephen chbosky
- the realm of possibility - david levithan
- a long way down - nick hornby
- diary - chuck palahniuk
- it's kind of a funny story - ned vizzini
- the book thief - markus zusak
- i am the messenger - markus zusak
- a corner of the universe - ann martin
- marley & me - john grogan
- just listen - sarah dessen
- the truth about forever - sarah dessen
- the bell jar - sylvia plath
- the catcher in the rye - j.d. salinger
- tunnel vision - keith lowe
- slaughterhouse five - kurt vonnegut
2 comments:
oohh! I love going to thrift stores for books :D
Oh Vy-Anh,
Sometimes I feel that too.
That people will be good mannered because society today should be civilized, right?
I've always thought, and well I still do think, that people would always be kind and honest. Maybe, it's just that I feel that's how humanity should be. People caring for one another, and doing kindly deeds. I would always think "People aren't that selfish" or "Someone will stop to help"
Sadly, I think it's easier for someone to become "evil", as you say, than to become a better person.
But I say that only because, I, myself have fallen into the cruelness of the world. To being that evil that exists.
But no worries Vy-Anh. Maybe, it's that you have high expectations of the world?
Because in everyone, of course there's a bit of evilness in them.
For lust and selfishness, minds becoming corrupt, and unruly, craving for that bit of wildness.
Which also reminds me of a question that was imposed on me two years back.
"Do you think that humans were born evil but later learn justice, and to do good? Or is it the other way around, where humans are ultimately born good but then are corrupted by evil and sin?"
Anyways, those are just my thoughts...
Oh, I haven't been to the doctor's since before kindergarten :D
So yea,
Who knows what's wrong with us people? XD
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